This morning I saw a post on Facebook from a lady on a business networking group I’m on. Someone close to her laughed at her business idea and the fact she wanted to make a living from it, and make some dosh along the way.
As ever the timing of these things are perfect. I, too have been having wobble (again – yawn) about my work; wondering what the hell am I doing yadda, yadda yadda…
Any hooow, this got me thinking, and feeling into Success & Fear. A good friend of mine calls me a Manifesting Magnet, so it stands to reason I can manifest anything I want.
The only difference is my mind set and (or) how I feel about something. Negative feelings and conversations, in my head result in negative outcomes. Because I manifested them, and boughtinto them!
So if I can manifest negatively, I can manifest positively. Yes?
So can you!
So, what do you do, if someone pours cold water on your dream? This baby you having secretly been nurturing for months or sometimes years?
Firstly, you step back from it, and see it for what it really is. Their fears, their doubts, their insecurities. These reactions are usually an inbuilt (or learnt) response, which they are totally unaware of. And the biggest one, is their fear.
Of course your baby idea is fragile, therefore your ego takes a bit of kicking. You begin to doubt your ability and question the validity of your project and your judgment.
What is interesting here, is that we believe these people, these doubters who have scorned our idea.
Because somebody has voiced an opinion, which is the polar opposite to what we want to achieve for ourselves, be believe them, and buy into their fear; own it, as our own. These feelings are accompanied with justifying thoughts, ‘I hadn’t thought of that’, ‘they could be right’ and so on.
This situation is doubly compounded, if the comments come from someone we respect or love.
OK; so that’s the negative, but how do you deal with it, and not let it affect you, cos once that seed of doubt is planted in our brain, it has this knack of taking us back to revisit it all the time.
First things first. Acknowledge it is there. This Fear, this crippling, paralysing Doubt.
Feel it, sit with it. I often write when I am struggling with something. By getting onto paper, it takes it out of my head, and I am able to give voice to the internal dialogue, arguments and conversations which swirl around in there. I call it Mind Dumping.
Second point. Don’t try to convince them you are right, and they are wrong, it will only fan the flames of fear.
Once you have Mind Dumped, if your fears are still sitting there waving at you, feel into them. Explore them. Not your thoughts, but with the feelings and sensations in your body. Usually they are felt in the heart, or stomach area. Try not to judge these feelings or yourself. Just become aware of them. You mind will also try and avoid the feelings, side step them, get up, make a cuppa. All kinds of avoidance mechanisms will surface. Anything to stop you feeling these feelings. Its normal behaviour. Our brain/ego takes over, trying to get us to avoid such sensations. Its job is to keep us safe, not put us in the firing line!
Neck and shoulder tension is another place it can sit. Usually because we have been trying to shield and fight off the negative thoughts and feelings, thus causing added tension.
By now, sitting with these negative feelings, they should have began to dissolve a bit. It make take a few attempts, to allow yourself to sink into this feeling of fear and doubt. To allow it to reside quietly whilst you observe and simply watch it, being aware of its presence, letting dissolve away quietly.
Ideas may surface from this practice too.
And finally, we come to manifesting your dream into reality.
If we can feel fear so acutely, then we are able to feel and experience joy and excitement just as vividly around our baby ideas.
So sit with a feeling of excitement, of pure unleashed joy in following that dream in your heart. Feel your heart lift as you think about following that passion. Sense that deep inner smile surface as your excitement brushes past it. Feel it, own it, allow the warmth that’s flows from it, to surround you.
Can’t feel it? Then imagine how it would feel to have that success, that freedom, those clients, that contract signed. Allow the excitement to rise, the smile to surface. feel it, own it, let it settle. Above all else. Remember This Feeling!
Hold it, and allow it to warm the cockles of your heart 🙂