New Years Eve 2018

Istanbul 

Soaking in bath a little while ago, nursing a sore jaw, from 5 plus hours of dental work over 2 days, it dawned on me.  I mean really DAWNED  on me how very lucky I am.

Much of  2018 and the far end of 2017 had it’s challenges,  and here I am, by choice, unable to celebrate with friends and booze, or eat (other than soup and sloppy bread) or party 2019 in raucously due to self inflicted pain, swelling and antibiotics.

2018 saw a myriad of changes, of highs and lows and alot of firsts. Pushing of personal boundaries and continued personal development.  Being supported by amazing people,  some of whom are friends and others strangers.
I have stood beside and held friends and family as their life has crumpled,  changed irrevocably, moved, separated and more.  Watched my 95yr old father in law pass away, step and into tempory care role of his wife of  73yrs, and step away again with some support in place she will accept.

I’ve travelled alone overseas to visit friends,  filled a bucket list trip with other friends to Scotland, sold my first  500 decks of Dragon Path Oracle Cards across the globe, and ordered more.

What an incredibly blessed 2018.
But what to take forward into 2019 and what to ‘chuck in fuck it bucket’?  

There are so many wonderful experiences, opportunities to grow from, even the downright painful.

Maybe the biggest one is I’m not a pack animal. I love my friends and family, am loyal to a fault, yet I don’t conform, I never have.

I do things my way. Possibly  not via the most direct route, but its my route. 
2018 saw me worrying about not being a part of a clique or group, comparing myself and judging myself, harshly against others. Their

work, knowledge, ability… the list is endless. To this end, one point of 2018 neatly saw me throwing the towel in, the fear had become too intense, too overwhelming.
A ‘chance’ conversation, support and practical advice saw me shift and  understand me from a place of  care and compassion.

The biggest was to trust me, trust my judgment, secure my boundaries and most importantly know my worth.  And that has nothing to do with finances, but more  about valuing me, my time, my work and my loved ones.

What are you taking into 2019?  What requires chucking in the 2018 fuck it bucket?  And how are you going to be kinder to you? 
I’d love to hear thoughts, successes and ideas

Much love as always
Caroline xx